Have you ever had a premonition?

Or deja-vu? You just knew something would happen?

Or have you ever had a dream about something – not knowing for sure what the dream meant at the time, but then months…maybe even years later, it means something?

I have problems with this. All the time.

My most recent experience:

My darling cat, who I’ve had for almost 7 years now, is deathly ill with liver disease.

Some unknown amount of months ago, I had a very vivid dream in the early hours of the morning where I was standing in the kitchen, holding her and crying, knowing that she was gone. I was wearing a sleeping t-shirt, so I can only assume this was upon waking or maybe even coming home in the morning from work (I work as a nurse overnights, usually…sometimes I work day shift)

I remember waking up from that dream and being alarmed. My kitty was always healthy and happy, with a voracious appetite. At the time, I never thought this could be a reality. Of course, I knew she wouldn’t live forever, but most of the cats my family has had over the years have lived for longggg periods of time.

My thought was that she would probably live into at least her teens, hell…maybe even make it to 20 or so, and she would die peacefully.

Now since she’s been sick for the last 3 weeks…I’m wondering, for those of you who may have or believe in extra sensory perception – why did I have this dream?

Was it a warning?

Was I irresponsible because I didn’t have her checked out right away, even though she was healthy? But then maybe they could’ve caught something early and it could’ve been prevented?

Is it a coincidence?

Or is it just my subconscious, letting me know this will someday happen?

I have these types of occurrences often.

How do you know when to take things seriously, though – or differentiate between paranoia and anxiety? I also have an extremely active and creative imagination, so…how to know in the future?

Of course, now I am blaming myself for what’s happening to her.

At this point, it is out of my hands. I am crying, bargaining, begging. Yes, she’s just a cat. At the end of the day, she’s still a little being that showed me unconditional love.

All I can do at this point is give her my best.